- - - - - What is life really like for a prodigal spouse? Tuesdays Bob shares from the prodigal's perspective, after being remarried to Charlyne for 19 years. Read more from Bob in some of his favorite books - http://www.stopdivorce.org/Index.php?viewItem=00217&viewCat=2 http://www.stopdivorce.org/Index.php?viewItem=9818&viewCat=2,10, http://www.stopdivorce.org/Index.php?viewItem=00080&viewCat=2 http://www.stopdivorce.org/Index.php?viewItem=00012&viewCat=2 http://www.stopdivorce.org/Index.php?viewItem=00013&viewCat=2 - - - - -
"DID YOU KNOW THE LORD WAS WORKING IN YOUR LIFE?"
My reply could be titled, "Ten Tales From The Far Country." At that time, I really did not know if God was working in my life. Summing it up, I knew I was not living as I should, plus some very odd things happening to me equaled something, but I was not ready to say it was God. Had I admitted it was Him, I knew enough to realize that I would have had to make some major changes, including going home. Allow me to share ten events from my prodigal days, and you can decide if God was at work, as Charlyne stood for our marriage and prayed for me, but saw no results.
The first Christmas I took a female, not the other woman, but another other woman, (can you relate?) to the Fort Lauderdale Christmas Pageant. I was proud of the seats I had gotten us for that large production. Right in the middle of the Christmas story, the Parable of the Prodigal Son had somehow been worked into the presentation. Of all the aisles in that huge auditorium, when the prodigal returned, with a spotlight following him, he happened to walk right by our seats. The female accompanying me was not in the picture after that night.
Second example: I was working late in Miami during a major tropical downpour. After 10 P.M. I started for my efficiency apartment, only to have a radiator hose blow out. I ended up standing in ankle deep water beside my bone-dry old car. As I dipped water from the street into my radiator, so that I could go a short distance before repeating the process, “Something” reminded me this scenario was like my life. Love abounded all around, just not where I needed it; on the inside.
Jump months ahead to example number three: In an attempt to get away from all that was happening to me, I moved 100 miles to the small town of Okeechobee and went to work for a funeral home. Until I found an apartment, the funeral home owner invited me to stay with he and his wife in their large home. On the first evening, my boss told me, "I’ll have the coffee ready at 6:00 A.M. That’s when we all get up to watch 'Praise the Lord' together." I knew Charlyne watched the same program, at the same hour, because she had invited me to watch it and I had scoffed at her. Now I had no choice. By the time I moved into my own apartment, I had begun to appreciate this program as a great way to start my day, and continued to watch it on my own. Something deep inside me felt good, knowing Charlyne and I were witnessing the same things at the same time. Satan had me so blinded that I continued in sin.
Number four: My girlfriend would come up every other weekend. One weekend, as she backed out of her garage, her vehicle stalled directly under her electric garage door. When she attempted to restart her car, the door came crashing down on top of it. My buddy, who owns a garage door company now tells me this was impossible, but somehow the door remote sensor was reacting to her car’s electronic ignition. Time and time again, she would attempt to start her car, and each time the garage door banged into her car’s roof. When she managed to drive from under the door, the message I received was, "Someone’s telling me not to come up."
Speaking of weekends and the other woman, here is example number five: One Saturday morning she was at my apartment and I was at the funeral home. She called to tell me it was all over, and she was packing to go home, which she did. I called Charlyne and unloaded on her for causing this. She had no idea what I was talking about, but later I learned how she rejoiced when I had blasted her because the other person was gone. When I reached my empty apartment, I found a note and the evidence of what had happened. My day planner had fallen off of a closet shelf by itself, (with the Lord’s help) and opened to a page where I had noted seeing Charlyne. These other people do not handle that very well. Sadly, a few weeks later she was back in the picture.
Number six: I had planned a New Year’s Eve at the other woman’s home. At 10:30 P.M. I was called back to work. During the two hour drive back to Okeechobee, my alternator failed. I ushered in the New Year sitting in a car with no lights, beside a two-lane road, with only cows for miles around. I finally reached Charlyne and asked her to come help me with transportation.
Are you convinced God was working in my life? I wasn’t, so here is example number seven: One of the popular radio stations in Okeechobee was a Christian station from Belle Glade. Whoever drove a funeral home car could change the radio station. A thousand and one times, when I would run an errand, the last driver had left the station set to that Christian station. One of the top songs of that day was about "rejoicing" over a prodigal coming home. I would get in a car, thinking about what I was doing, and "prodigal music" soon would be filling the car. I began to like the song, and finally stopped changing the station.
Number eight example: Funeral directors have to be nice to everyone, especially in a small community. Time and time again, I would meet a minister at a funeral service who could read my mail. A co-worker, a retired cowboy, was a member of Gideons International. In his sweet, but firm way, he would attempt to witness to me, after observing how I was living. I dealt with families where there had been a remarriage. Was God dealing with me?
Number nine was the ongoing example that helped bring me to my senses. I was under so much conviction, and in yet another attempt to run from God, I moved to Fort Piece and went to work for an organ transplant program. The program was statewide, and they flew staff around in their own plane. I enjoyed the job, but began to be aware of plane crashes.
Number ten took place one Saturday afternoon. I was driving by a cemetery and noticed a graveside service starting. I looked at my watch and it was 2:00 P.M. The Sunday paper reported a plane had crashed into several cars and the wall in front of that cemetery. The accident occurred at 2:05 PM. Had I been five minutes later I could have been involved. The company plane was sold, and the new owner crashed the plane on the way home. I took my girlfriend out to dinner at a theme restaurant located adjacent to an airport. I asked our server what the lights were, far across the airport from us. "A plane crashed this afternoon," he informed us.
I have shared only ten examples out of about ten thousand. Charlyne and I were remarried within weeks of event number ten. I had to acknowledge that God was working in my life, and He was talking to me. I knew that if I did not stop being an embarrassment to the cause of Christ, God could take my life, to get me out of the way of His Kingdom work, and it might be in a plane crash.
Charlyne and I are burdened when a stander writes us about how they are giving up, because nothing is happening. These email always attack God because He did not move according to their timetable. If that person could only be where we have been, and know that God is dealing with their prodigal every day, they would never give up.
Our Lord God is moving mountains to get your prodigal’s attention. You have no idea what is happening in your prodigal’s heart today. A stander giving up is always based on a combination of time and circumstances, not on what God has promised. The quitting stander attempts to play God, as they decide the timetable deadline for a specific action. Praise God that He does not work that way, or we would all be on the outside of having life eternal.
The hand of God is not too short to reach the one you love. He only asks that you stand firm, pray, and leave the rest up to Him.
"You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. For in just a very little while, "He who is coming will come and will not delay. But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him.’ But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved.'" Hebrews 10: 36-39
Be blessed, Bob Steinkamp Rejoice Marriage Ministries, Inc.® Post Office Box 10548 Pompano Beach, FL 33061 USA http://rejoiceministries.org (Ministry) http://stopdivorce.org (Bookstore)
P.S. - It's hard to imagine that we have thousands of subscribers, many of whom are struggling to stand, but who have never heard one of my wife's teaching tapes. There are others who listen to their tapes dozens of times over, because of the comfort and support they receive. There are dozens of $4 tapes available from - http://stopdivorce.org
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