DjembeQueen's Blogger Blog

The Life & Times of DjembeQueen as I start another Blogging expedition This blog is more of the web as I come across websites & online articles which I like & want others to know about with some comments of my own

Monday, November 27, 2006

FW: [marriagerestoration] Doreen's Daily Delights - Nov 22 - Lean NOT On Your Own Understanding

There is a lot of questioning going on

as to whether to continue to “Stand” or just give up & move on

so I thought that I’d pass this along to give some inspiration

as well as some food for thought

When we question the wisdom of continuing our Stand

or doing as our families & friends say to just move on since our spouse has walked away

we are in fact saying the God isn’t strong enough

to beat Satan or the world or the other person who has caused our spouses to walk away

or the “mental disease” of midlife crisis

We’ll only have peace when we’re able to truly let go

& let God do His work in His way & in His time

without interference from our meddling or questioning His wisdom in our lives

so that when the time comes for restoration

we’ll be able to be there for our spouses –

how many marriages would’ve been restored

had not the 1st spouse just waited while God was at work

rather than turning to the world & moving on to a new husband or wife?

-----Original Message-----
From: [] On Behalf Of marriagerestoration
Wednesday, November 22, 2006 10:12 AM
Subject: [marriagerestoration] Doreen's Daily Delights - Nov 22 - Lean NOT On Your Own Understanding

Lean Not On Your Own Understanding

Every day we face decisions about whom we will trust, believe in and
obey. Each day we are called to lift our hearts to God and let Him
strengthen us and transform us into the person He wants us to be. We
can stand firm with confidence knowing that through God's mercy, He
will see us through the battle waging over our families.

A long time ago, I told you a story about three ladies I know whose
husbands left them to live in sin. This happened long before the
inception of this Ministry. I spoke to them a few years ago to find
out if their husbands returned. I want to let you know that
eventually all three husbands returned. Not one or two, but ALL
THREE husbands eventually returned home. I know these people
personally. Also, at the time, these ladies were not Christians, and
they did not even pray for restoration. Did you hear that? THEY DID
NOT EVEN PRAY FOR RESTORATION! Yet, it still happened. That, my
friends, is proof that God intended one man to be with one woman for

Why am I telling you this? We need to wait on God. We cannot set a
timetable or schedule for God. While your spouses are away, God is
doing a work in you and He is also working on their hearts. More
often than not these prodigals are broken and repentant when they

We need to be faithful to God and wait for healing and restoration
without complaining. We need to take God at His Word, and allow Him
to work through us. We join the multitude of saints joyfully
celebrating victory around God's throne! God will not let us be
defeated. Families are being destroyed due to lack of faith. The
battle is not over until you give up. DO NOT GIVE UP! Many
ask, "How long will it take for my marriage to be healed? I am weary
and can no longer wait." God will take as much time as it takes to
transform you and your spouse into whom He would have you to be. As
I have said before, for some, this transformation can happen in a
matter of weeks. For others, it will take a much longer time for God
to complete His work. The key is making a commitment to trust God no
matter how long it takes! God does not give up on His children, why
are we so quick to give up on God?

"This is what the Lord says to you: 'Do not be afraid or discouraged
because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's.'"
(2 Chronicles 20:15).

God is fighting the battle for our marriage! Our task during this
period of waiting is to be faithful to God, standing firm in
obedience to His call. We are to worship and praise God, thanking
Him for the victory. We are not to get in God's way by trying to
manipulate our spouses home. Actions such as this do nothing but
prolong the battle. Stand back and let God fight the battle for your

"'You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions;
stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you. Do not be
afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them and the Lord will
be with you.'" (2 Chronicles 20:17).

God is speaking directly to you in His Word. Why is it so hard to
believe Him? Why is it so hard to trust the salvation of our marriage
to the Lord? Look at the promises God has given us in just one verse
in His Word.

"You will not have to fight this battle!"

"Stand firm!"

"See the deliverance the Lord will give you!"

"Do not be afraid!"

"Do not be discouraged!"

"The Lord will be with you!"

Where else can you find promises such as these? We certainly cannot
find them in the world! When will we stop trusting in ourselves and
start trusting in God, who alone can bring healing and restoration to
our marriage?

"Who is the King of glory? The Lord strong and mighty, the Lord
mighty in battle." (Psalm 24:8).

Start today believing and trusting God for the healing and
restoration of your marriage. Pray the following Psalms. May they
encourage you to stand firm in the faith. Our God is fighting the
battle for your marriage and He will not be defeated!

"To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul; in you I trust, O my God."
(Psalm 25:1).

"Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your
truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you
all day long." (Psalm 25:4-5).

"Good and upright is the Lord; therefore He instructs sinners in His
ways. He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them His way.
All the ways of the Lord are loving and faithful for those who keep
the commands of His covenant." (Psalm 25:8-10).

"Who, then, is the man that fears the Lord? He will instruct him in
the way chosen for him. He will spend his days in prosperity, and his
descendants will inherit the land." (Psalm 25:12-13).

"Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The
troubles of my heart have multiplied; free me from my anguish."
(Psalm 25:16-17).

"May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope is in
you." (Psalm 25:21).

"The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The Lord
is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?"
(Psalm 27:1).

"One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell
in the house of the Lord all the days of my life." (Psalm 27:4).

"Sing to the Lord, you saints of his; praise his holy name. For His
anger lasts only a moment, but His favor lasts a lifetime; weeping
may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning."
(Psalm 30:4-5).

"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in
the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord." (Psalm 27:13-14).

Be encouraged

Pastor Doreen




Sunday, November 26, 2006

FW: Weekly Marriage Builder, November 12, 2006: Yesterday's Anger is Dangerous

2nd in the series on conflict resolution

-----Original Message-----
From: Jimmy Evans - MarriageToday []
Sent: Sunday, November 12, 2006 1:05 AM
Subject: Weekly Marriage Builder, November 12, 2006: Yesterday's Anger is



Presented by MarriageToday with Jimmy & Karen


Dear theresa,

In last week's Marriage Builder I began a series of articles on the issue of
conflict resolution in marriage. In the previous article I talked about the
importance of accepting our anger and dealing with it openly. The Bible
tells us to " angry, but do not sin..." Ephesians 4:26 NKJV

This means we must not deny our anger. Neither should we use our
anger to justify wrong behavior.

Positive conflict resolution begins with an acceptance of our anger and by
allowing our spouse to be honest about theirs also. The second step in
positive conflict resolution has to do with how we confront each other.
Even though some anger can be dealt with in prayer or on a personal level,
much of our anger related to our spouses behavior must be talked out.

This means we need to learn how to approach one another when we are
angry. This is such a critical lesson for us to learn because uncontrolled
or unrighteous anger can be so destructive. In learning to deal with
confrontation, we first of all need to wait until our anger is under control
but to do it today. Ephesians 4:26b-27 tells us, " not let the sun go
down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil."

Going to bed on unresolved anger gives the devil an opportunity to interpret
our spouse's behavior to us and accuse them. The word "devil" in Ephesians
4:27 is the Greek word "diabolos". It means "slanderer". Wait for an hour
or two until your emotions are under control but don't fall into the bad
habit of going to bed angry and waiting for days or weeks to confront.

Today's anger is very manageable. Yesterday's anger is dangerous because it
has fermented and been affected by diabolos the slanderer. He is a master
at dividing us and creating offenses. Remember, he is a liar and the father
of lies. His job is to offend you at your spouse and convince you they are
against you and their motives are evil. Unresolved anger is his open door
to do this.

When Karen and I first got married we would go for months angry at each
other. When we got mad, we got quiet. That is my natural personality.
When I'm the maddest, I'm the quietest. That is ok on the short term,
because it keeps me from saying or doing things I would regret in response
to my anger. However, it is a very negative trait in the long term.

Karen and I have learned over the years not to get mad and get quiet. We
know how dangerous it is to give the devil an opportunity in our marriage
through unresolved anger. We make it a practice to confront each other in
love every day. It is just a matter of housekeeping in a good relationship.
It takes anger and makes it a domesticated cat. Going to bed on anger
allows it to grow into a raging lion. Anger is going to be in your marriage
but how you deal with it determines it's size and nature.

You don't have to be afraid of anger. It is a reality in every marriage.
The first thing you do is to allow yourself and your spouse to be honest
about your anger. The second thing you do is confront today, but wait a few
minutes or a few hours until you are in control and won't say or do anything
you'll regret or that will damage your spouse.

I have a very important message for you next week on conflict resolution.
Until then, talk with your spouse about this issue. Make a commitment to
allow each other the freedom to talk about your negative feelings without
being punished. Also, make a commitment never to go to bed angry again
without talking things out and mapping out a plan of resolve. This is
crucial to the success of your marriage.


Jimmy Evans









© 2006, MarriageToday :: PO Box 59888 :: Dallas, TX 75229


Wednesday, November 22, 2006

FW: Weekly Marriage Builder, November 05, 2006: Be Angry...But Learn to Deal With It

Thought this was worth passing on

-----Original Message-----
From: Jimmy Evans - MarriageToday []
Sent: Sunday, November 05, 2006 1:05 AM
Subject: Weekly Marriage Builder, November 05, 2006: Be Angry...But Learn to
Deal With It



Presented by MarriageToday with Jimmy & Karen


Dear theresa,

Conflict resolution skills are critical for us to learn. The reason is
because we are sure to have conflict in marriage. Without the ability to
successfully resolve our problems, anger and emotional distance builds over

Every marriage has problems, even good marriages. The difference between a
good and a bad marriage is simply the ability to work through our problems.
The good news is every person can learn the skills of successful conflict
resolution. Regardless of the mistakes you may have made in the past, you
can turn your marriage and life around by learning these skills. By the
way, conflict resolution skills don't just work in marriage they help us in
every relationship.

Because this issue is so important, I'm going to spend the next several
weeks explaining to you the different skills involved in dealing with
problems when they occur. I'm going to begin by talking about how to deal
with your anger.

Ephesians 4:26 says, "Be angry, and do not sin, do not let the sun go down
on your anger..." NKJV The first thing the Apostle Paul tells us about
dealing with anger is that we must acknowledge it. He says, "Be angry...".
Denying anger doesn't make it go away, it makes it build up
until it explodes in a destructive and unmanageable manner.

When Karen and I got married, we didn't know how to deal with our anger. We
both stuffed a lot of it inside and about every three months we would have
an explosive fight. Sometimes our fights were about the dumbest little
things but they were just the spark that caused the stored up anger inside
of us to explode.

What we learned over time is that we couldn't go to bed on anger. We not
only learned to accept our own anger but we also learned that we had to give
each other the right to be angry and to express anger. In dysfunctional
relationships, there is always a wrong method of dealing with anger. The
range goes from an explosive anger that damages others to an enabling spouse
who lives in the fear of their own anger and what might happen if they were
honest about it. Many people live in fear of their own anger and their
spouse's anger. This is one of the ways you know you aren't resolving
conflict properly.

Anger isn't necessarily good or bad it's just real. As human beings we get
angry. Sometimes it is because we've been genuinely violated. In other
cases, it's because we're immature or have unrealistic expectations or are
selfish. When I'm angry and need to get it out I'm
not claiming that I'm right, I'm just angry.

Learning to be honest about your anger and allowing your spouse to do
the same is the first step in successful conflict resolution. Remember,
Paul said, "Be angry and do not sin..." Once you are able to accept your
anger you must also commit to doing the right thing with it. You can never
use your anger to justify unrighteous behavior. The end doesn't justify the
means. How you resolve conflict is crucial. It must be done in a manner
that honors God and treats your spouse with dignity and care.

Next week I'm going to share another important skill in resolving conflict.
Until then I encourage you to examine your own heart about your
relationship with anger and how you deal with it. If you're married, I
would encourage you to have a discussion with your spouse about this issue.
If trouble breaks out I'll see you next week!


Jimmy Evans




© 2006, MarriageToday :: PO Box 59888 :: Dallas, TX 75229

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Checked by AVG Free Edition.
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4:59 PM

Thursday, November 16, 2006

FW: What "I Need My Space" Means

I think I sent this already to the group,

but since there have been many questions online & on the phone I’ve decided to resend this

As you’ve already heard from me in the past I will always refer to Christian Authors & try to stay away from Secular sources

Although this guy is Secular it’s good to compare what the world has to say vs. what Christian Authors who consult with God’s Word have to say in how to deal with this sin problem in which we find ourselves stuck

-----Original Message-----

Tuesday, March 14, 2006 2:43 PM
To: ''
Subject: What "I Need My Space" Means

This is an interesting article for those of us who are dealing with husbands who are either in affairs or we suspect may be considering moving out so they can have an affair etc
Dr Don Harvey in his book “When the One You Love Wants to Leave” is great for explaining in a Christian way how to handle the separation process as well as the reconnection process & how to make sure that the motives for reconnecting are done for the correct reasons & in the proper way
Dr Jim Conway in his books describes the Mid Life Crisis, & the whys & the stages that the MLCers will go thru & some of the likely actions which will occur during that process
This article by Dr Huizenga is more like a dissection of the issues which the MLCer is going thru when he’s involved in an affair & he’s selling an e-book which I’ve never purchased since I’m a person who wants to be able to sit & reread sections of the pages while I’m trying to understand the information which is being presented to me
The items in high lights are my take on what he’s saying when taken in comparative with the other authors who I’ve gotten the chance to read their books or have seen during chats or website b boards with the authors I’m referencing in the high light
Infidelity Discovered: "I Need My Space!" Say What?!

By Dr. Huizenga - The Infidelity Coach

When infidelity rears its ugly face, the cheating spouse often explains his/her dilemma with the words, "I Need my Space!"

You ask a couple questions, i.e. why are you doing this? What's going to happen? When will this end? etc. and the same ol' response is, "I don't know. I just need my space for a while."

You are left hanging. You have no clue what that means (nor probably does your partner). Neither of you are able to articulate specifics, which usually means you are stuck.

Not good!

Allow me to point out some common themes behind this phrase. I want for you to get to the "heart of the matter" more quickly and with more confidence move toward resolution.

Putting "flesh" on this phrase will help you move from being stuck to confronting the "real issues" head on.

1. Someone primarily in a "I Don't Want to Say No" extramarital affair, wants you off his/her back. They want to do what they want to do when they want to do it. Little regard for you (sorry). I need my space, means: "Leave me alone. Don't put any pressure on me. Stay away. Do your thing, and I will do mine."

(this is the selfish MLCer in a nut shell – sounds like the childish teen or toddler who has no care or thought of anyone else’s needs other than their own – there is no reasoning with a 2 yr old so basically you’ve got to accept that you’re not likely to be able to reason with your husband when he’s in this stage either – simply do what you can to stay out of his way & do what you can to protect yourself both financially as well as emotionally – during this time period you’ll see a lot of anger directed at you for everything that ever been wrong in his life – simply ask God for the strength to get through this & to not take personally the things which come out of his mouth)

2. "I need my space" for someone in the "My Marriage Made Me Do It" affair means, "I need to get away from the marriage (you). I don't know how to respond to you. I give you too much power! I want to run away and find the Greener Promised Land where something out there will make my life all better!"

(Dr Don Harvey & Dr Jim Conway both seem to make it clear that during the MLC process until our husbands work thru their issues & finally figure out for themselves that the Grass really isn’t Greener over the Septic Tank all we can do is be emotionally supportive showing AGAPE Love but staying our distance from their drama & work on our own positive life changes – Dr Harvey’s book is great as it explains the “How” we can get thru this time period while Dr Conway’s book gives us the “Why” our husbands are acting this way)

3. Your partner who "Can't Say No" needs to hide. He/she needs to hide from his/her shame. "I need my space" means, "I can't stand to face who I am. I can't stand to face you, because I'm reminded of how often I fail, of how little and basically impotent I am. I want to keep hiding from my truth."

(this is so typical of MLCers with childhood issues & gives you a clue as to some of the issues which he may need to deal with –

Was your husband a man with low self esteem & why he was so unable to say “NO” to people in the past?

It may be time to check into some things which in the past you have done to inadvertently helped to continue the low self esteem issues which your husband had… change those things which you are able by seriously thinking about how you may have said things were they up-building or were they by tone possibly indicating disapproval or incompetence?

This was one my own problems the way I said things I didn’t realize were condescending & too blunt so I’ve had to work on the “how” I say things as well as looking for ways in which I can give praises to Byron for those things which I do appreciate him for those things which he does do for me & the family)

4. Your partner who "Fell out of Love...and just loves being in love" cannot pay attention to you. It is diverted. It is gone. He/she is obsessed with the OP. The theme here: "I MUST be with the OP. I MUST purse my feelings. (I am owned by them). I MUST have this drama and adrenaline in my life. I MUST be with someone where this "high" is triggered.

(This is all part of the MLC process – just plan to do a lot of research reading & this is the time period to work on some of those life projects which you had for yourself so that you can move thru this time period positively –

there is nothing that we can do to make this process go any faster since we’re not the ones who broke our husbands we’re unable to fix it – regardless of what they may say to us & many times they will say the cruelest things as well as the wildest & craziest –

this is also a time for getting closer on your walk with God & focusing upon HIS WORD rather than our sitch at home –

develop a sense of humor to help you get through some of the obvious lies & things which your husband will say to you, meaning smile if possible regardless of what they say & nod your head but do try to bite your tongue & keep the laugh to yourself until after you get off the phone or he leaves -

5. "I Want to Get Back at Him/Her" drips with anger and frustration. "I need my space" means: "How does it feel, huh? You hurting? I hope so! When I say, "I need my space" do you get scared? Feel powerless? Do you feel the anger seething just below the surface? That's what I've been feeling for a long time and I kinda enjoy you squirming."

(ok this one isn’t a MLC issue in itself – Revenge is the Reason for this affair –

this is a case of the husband being unable to forgive at this moment for a previous wrong - the wrong may be something which you may have done in the past or something which he’s taking out on you for a wrong done to him by people in his past, regardless of what the reason is there is no justification for an affair & take this anger to God to give you the ability to see where his anger may be coming from & also for God to open his eyes to the fact that this is wrong to seek revenge on you

there may be some legitimate trust issues on the part of your husband as well as he may have gotten involved emotionally with this person while you were out in the far away land – if you had an affair in the past or took off for what ever reason now is the time to sit back & consider what were the feelings that you went through because at least you can relate a bit of how your husband now feels but at the same time just as you didn’t want to feel rushed or pushed or have to work things out you must give your husband the right to go through all of the stages of feelings which you went through & give him the time & space that he needs right now to get over his anger for what ever it was that you in fact did to him & now is the time which you have to show to him that regardless of what he does you are now worthy of his trust as well as his love – pray for healing of your emotions as well as his because you’re both hurting right now & only God can bring the true healing in your hearts that’s needed

2 wrongs do not make a right & it’s great that you’ve come back to God’s plan for your marriage, now is the time to fully Repent of anything which you have done & ask God for forgiveness & fully receive it yourself – if you need to for your husband’s sake do ask for his forgiveness after offering him a heartfelt apology for anything which you have in fact done

Dr Willard Harley’s book His Needs Her Needs may be a good place to start in trying to figure out where you can work on improvements in your marriage & pin pointing just where you need to change to meet the needs of your husband –

Dr Don Harvey’s book will help to assist you while during this time period your husband is out in this type of affair & definitely use this time to work on showing your husband that you have changed not by saying it but in your whole life in actions & how you conduct yourself during this time period

Know that regardless of what you did in the past & what your husband may throw in your face now because of that past – It IS In The PAST & God has FULLY Forgiven YOU & IT IS FORGOTTEN as far as the East is from the West it is Removed from God’s Memory so if God has Forgiven You Forgive Yourself & Pray that God will open your husband’s eyes & heart that he’ll also be able to forgive you as well

6. Your partner may choose infidelity to prove his/her sense of desirability. The theme is: "I'm hurting. I'm confused... big time! I'm doing what I really don't want to do, and I can't seem to get a handle on what's driving me. I feel like I'm inflicting pain on you, and I don't want to do that. You don't deserve it. Please give me some space to heal myself and get rid of my demons.

(this is so very much a classic example of the running away & actions during the Replay stage of MLC which Dr Jim Conway – the need to Prove Desirability

hard as this will be for us it’s just something that they have to do & since we have no control over what they do all we can do is put our best foot forward & remind them that We Too Look GOOD & what ever extra weight we may have put on while having kids we should do our best to take off & get back to thinking & looking a bit better when they come over for what ever reason – the best that we can do towards what it was that we looked like when we 1st got married)

7. "I Want to Be Close to Someone...but can't stand intimacy spells ambivalence. "I want my space...I think?!, but you will still be there for me, won't you? I'm confused. I don't know what I want. I need time to sort it out. (But, it never gets sorted out. He/she finds "space" between you and the OP where commitment to neither is attained.) Feel like you are dangling on the end of a rope?

(Dr James Dobson in his book Love Must be Tough would address this type of behavior by making an ultimatum & sticking to it & let your husband suffer the loss of your family life

Dr Don Harvey in his book When the One You Love Wants to Leave would advise that you allow your husband to simply have his wish at this moment in time & definitely DO NOT Make Love to your Husband during this time period so that he has to face the whole truth of his actions & have the loss of your sex life while showing AGAPE Love until he’s ready to re-commit to the marriage

Dr Willard Harley in his book His Needs Her Needs seems also to give that impression as Dr Harvey that your husband has to see that the OW is unable to fully meet his needs & Dr Harley seems to advise also that you give your husband an ultimatum – what I like is that Dr Harley does advise us to actually look at the OW & try to see what is it that the OW is meeting as far as the MLCer’s needs

Dr Jim Conway’s approach is to love our husbands from a distance with the understanding that they are sick right now but also work on the issues which MLCers seem to focus on as complaints & show AGAPE Love during this time period)

Take some time to reflect on the pattern that seems most prevalent in your situation. Understanding may help calm your feelings.

Seeing the patterns often helps intentionally plan some statements or actions that enables both of you to articulate more clearly some of the powerful personal needs that dominate and create havoc.

***** End of Article ******

I hope that this article has given you a chance to think about some of the information which is out there & allows you to know that much of what our husbands are doing & saying is just so predictable & as Dr Don Harvey says on page 17 of his book – “Rich or poor, educated or not, it makes little difference – people in crisis all tend to behave the same. … It is because there is such commonality in crisis & pain that I can write this book, for with crisis & pain & commonality comes predictability. There is predictability in the pain by an individual in crisis. There is also predictability in the courses of action followed by a couple in separation. The fact that there is predictability in personal crisis allows for intervention while giving us room for hope.”

So now it’s back to going thru the study guide questions – of the 20+ members very few have submitted either answers to the questions or at least a notation of what the question has taught in the asking – Reminder only You can do the work You need to do

During this very difficult time period we’re to turn to God – Stormie reminds us - as Wives it’s our jobs to Pray it’s God’s job to answer in His Way in His Time

Your Sister in Christ & Fellow Stander


Sunday, November 12, 2006

from Dutch Sheets - Urgent Prayer Alert

Urgent Prayer Alert

I have been waiting several weeks to write this prayer alert, making every effort to hear from the Lord as clearly as possible. I try not to write national prayer alerts frequently – only when I feel they are urgent. This is probably one of the most important assignments I’ve ever had. Although it is unusually long, please read it prayerfully and pass it on.

In our partnering with God to turn America back to its Christian heritage and God-given destiny – indeed, to experience another great awakening that will impact every aspect of our culture and bring millions of people to Christ – we are at a great crossroads. I believe we are at the deciding point in the war. While writing this letter I was handed a newsletter of Cindy Jacobs, a prophet and international leader in the prayer movement; she believes this also, stating: “As I pray for the United States, I see that we are at a crossroads where we will either keep the ground we have taken and advance to see our nation transformed, or we will deteriorate at an alarming rate.”

The Battle of the Bulge

A friend of mine likens where we are to the Battle of the Bulge. This battle was an intense counter offensive launched by Hitler in WW II – after D Day, when it looked like the Allies had won the war, Hitler tried one final, desperate onslaught to turn the tide. This caught the Allies by surprise and, though we eventually defeated Hitler’s armies, was for a season demoralizing and very costly to us. Likewise today, an intense counter offensive has been orchestrated from Hell to pull down President Bush and derail the destiny of America. This whirlwind of darkness over America is bringing great national confusion and is causing paralysis even in the praying church.

I have sensed this strong confusion in both the civil and spiritual realms, from leaders on down. It is strong in Washington D.C. – godly governmental leaders know things are in disarray and that something is desperately wrong, but also say that nothing seems to work when it comes to reversing it. Spiritual leaders also know things are not right – that we have lost momentum and that anti-Christ forces seem to be prevailing – but no one seems to know what to do about it. My friend Lou Engle, in a recent prayer alert said, “Wherever I go, I can feel the attitude of resignation, criticism and despair…” Lou’s entire alert can be found at

The Spirit of Babylon

Chuck Pierce, another friend and internationally trusted prophet connected our desperate condition to the war in Iraq: “the spirit of Babylon is slapping us around.” Iraq is modern day Babylon. Babylon means “confusion,” which is obviously one of the results of this spiritual war. America’s armies had no problem taking out Saddam’s physical army, but we are now dealing with an ancient principality, the spirit of Babylon, which cannot be defeated with natural weapons and strategies. This spirit is currently, though I believe it not be permanently, prevailing against us. As previously stated, the symptoms of confusion and disarray can be seen in the church, on our president and in the nation in general.

A further result of all this on our president is political disfavor. He has one of the most unfavorable performance ratings of any president in history, ranking down with Nixon during Watergate. The cover of one major magazine reads: “How Low Can He Go?” Usually when the economy thrives – and ours is – a president’s ratings are high, (even if he is sexually involved with an intern and lies about it!). But not this president. He has lost his favor and consequently his voice, neither of which will return until certain things occur.

A Dream About the President

Regarding this loss of voice, a pastor related to me a dream he had recently about President Bush. The president was in a jail cell in a desert region. He was very agitated and his bottom lip was torn in half. I believe this desert region represents Iraq and the tearing of the president’s lip pictures my assertion that his voice has been torn from him.

As the dream continued a man grabbed the president from behind, and said, “Let go. Give in.” Snakes then came out of the man’s cloak, wrapped around the president and one of them bit his torn lip. The president fell to the ground and disappeared. The snake then took the form of a woman, looked at the man having the dream (who had run in to try and help the president) and said, “There is nothing you can do to stop this.”

The man in the dream changing into a serpent confirms to me that we are no longer dealing with flesh and blood in Iraq, but with “principalities and powers” (see Ephesians 6:12). They have entrapped our president, stolen his voice and intend to completely destroy his effectiveness. Their ultimate goal is to steal his destiny, which is warring against terrorism and shifting the courts, especially the Supreme Court of America. Though the president has been disabled and seemingly taken out by this spirit, it is not true that there is nothing we can do to stop it. I will address this momentarily.

The Reality of Where We Are

It is vital for us to grasp the magnitude of this spiritual war against America and our president, and also to realize that the forces of evil are currently prevailing, though it need not remain so. If the November, 2006 elections were held today, it is almost certain that pro-life and morally conservative voices would lose some, if not complete, control of Congress. It is also quite likely that if the third vacancy occurred on the Supreme Court now (and I believe it is coming soon), one of two things would happen. Either Bush would bow to the temptation to appoint a moderate because of his weak position; or if he appointed a true conservative constitutionalist like Roberts or Alito, the liberals would be empowered enough to stop the nomination through filibustering or character assassination.

Worse yet, if the vacancy doesn’t occur until after the November elections and conservatives do lose control of Congress, we can very likely kiss goodbye our current opportunity to shift the Supreme Court of America. This would be the most devastating setback of our day. The consequences are unthinkable. The killing of babies and pro-death culture would continue, God would continue to be unwelcome in schools, government and public life and another generation would spiral further downward into Godless, humanistic relativism. Our God-given destiny in America could be lost indefinitely, perhaps forever. We simply cannot allow this.

Regarding the war on terrorism, if we don’t turn the tide spiritually and do so fairly soon, it will turn into a quagmire that our generation doesn’t have the strength, courage, boldness or selflessness to endure. This is the reality of where we are.

What God Is Saying to the Church

What must happen in the praying church and with our president at this critical time? There are biblical pictures that can help us identify our current position and point us toward the right strategy. First, where is the church and what must we do?

If the praying church does not re-engage in informed, consistent and fervent intercession for our nation and president NOW, we will lose our Battle of the Bulge. Our past victories and the ground we have gained are all on the line. So is our future. We have grown complacent and overconfident, as did the Israelites at Ai. In their attempt to conquer the promised land, Israel had won a great and impressive victory at Jericho (see Joshua 6). However, they grew overconfident and when they confronted the next town – small and insignificant Ai – did not pray for God’s help and strategy. Consequently, God wasn’t with them. The result was a devastating defeat.

We, too, have grown spiritually overconfident and complacent due to our recent victories. Now, like Joshua after the defeat at Ai, we are confused and disoriented (see Joshua 7:6-9). We must re-engage in prayer immediately. Lou Engle, in the above mentioned prayer alert also said, “Maybe President Bush’s legacy and the future of our nation hinge more on our prayers than on the whole political debate that rages now.” Right on, Lou, except I believe we can scratch the word “maybe.” Our future absolutely hinges on our prayers.

What God Is Saying to Our President

What of our president? In biblical context where is he, and what must he do? In Genesis 32, Jacob, Abraham’s grandson and the man who produced the nation of Israel through his twelve sons, came to his own personal crossroads. He, like our president, had come to a great crisis. Years earlier Jacob had connived to attain his brother Esau’s birthright and stolen the blessing reserved for him as the firstborn son. Now, twenty years later, Jacob is returning to face Esau, who has sworn to kill him. On the way, he has a life-changing encounter with God (see Genesis 32:24-32). Several parts of this story parallel where our president currently is and what he must do:

1) Jacob was left alone. Consistent with his conniving nature, which is what his name meant, Jacob’s possessions, servants and family had all been sent ahead to “appease” Esau. Then, in his wrestling with the angel, Jacob’s thigh – a symbol of strength – was dislocated, causing him to walk with a permanent limp. Everything Jacob owned, all of his family and now, all of his strength, was gone. God was allowing him to lose all, at least Jacob thought so, and also removing from him what he had relied on all of his life – his ability to connive (which, again, is the meaning of his name) his way out of trouble and into blessing through his own strength and manipulation.

For our president, I believe this conniving nature of Jacob pictures what occurs so often in the political realm. Not that the political world and those who are a part of it are necessarily evil, but a political spirit is. It is the equivalent of a “Jacob” nature – which we’re all born with – that believes there is always a way to reverse our fortunes through manipulation and control, conniving and self-effort. Some actually prevail through this spirit, but God will not allow Bush to succeed by operating in it. He has, therefore, allowed our president to lose favor for a season and nothing Bush has done can or will reverse this. Politics cannot help him, Rove can’t, his party can’t, and his troops in Iraq and Afghanistan cannot. God wants our president to know that the only one who can help him now is the One who put him where he is: Himself.

This does not necessarily mean our president has sinned or failed. Of course, he is human and therefore imperfect. And like all of us he has a Jacob nature to contend with. But this doesn’t make him a failure in God’s eyes. There is nothing to indicate that God was angry with Jacob but rather that He wanted to move him further toward his destiny, which was to birth the nation of Israel. His Jacob nature stood in the way and God needed to change it. This is what must occur in our president, which brings me to the second parallel to Jacob and our president.

2) Jacob’s name was changed to Israel. (See Genesis 32:28) Names represented nature, identity and purpose in those days. That Jacob was after one thing – restored favor and blessing, and God was after another – a nature change, is obvious in the story. Jacob finally realized this when he responded to the angel’s question of what his name was: “The Man asked him, ‘What is your name?’ And in shock of realization, whispering he said, ‘Jacob’ [supplanter, schemer, trickster, swindler]!” (Genesis 32:27, Amplified)

Jacob’s acknowledgment of his condition, equivalent to repentance and confession, allowed God to break off of him the Jacob nature. God then re-named him Israel, moving him into his destiny. Likewise, God has a destiny on our president that cannot be accomplished through politics or human ability. Only the power, wisdom and enablement of the Holy Spirit can equip President Bush to accomplish his destiny concerning terrorism and the courts of America. I want to be very bold and make a statement that may seem unusual regarding a government leader: God has removed favor from our president and is wrestling with him, in order to remove from him all confidence that he can prevail through human strength and methods, including politics. He wants him to walk with a limp. God wants to anoint him for his assignment, giving him a supernatural ability to prevail. To accomplish this, He desires to visit our president in a holy and awesome way, just as He did Jacob. President Bush has an appointment with God!

3) Jacob named the place Peniel, which means “the face of God.” He stated, "I have seen God face to face, yet my life has been preserved." Jacob’s life was transformed, favor with Esau was given and all possessions were returned. In an interesting irony, the word “appease” (verse 20) – what Jacob was attempting with Esau – and the word Peniel come from the same Hebrew root which means “face.” To appease is to put something in another person’s “face” in order to buy or procure favor. God was in essence saying to Jacob, “You can’t appease your enemy, but you can appease Me. Facing your enemy through the Jacob (political) spirit won’t help you anymore, but facing Me will.”

Likewise, God is saying to our president that He alone holds the key to favor and blessing in this hour. President Bush cannot prevail through appeasement, politics or any other human effort alone. But if he will face God and rely solely on Him, God will visit him face to face, favor will return and the president can fulfill his destiny. We must pray this understanding/revelation to our president and we must birth this holy visitation. For him to live and operate in a political world without being caught up in it will indeed require great revelation and humility. This could come either through God speaking to him personally or by getting the right individual to him with this message. Our responsibility is to pray until it happens. If it does not, our president will not recover and America is in big trouble.

[For a complete explanation, you can order the message I recently shared on this subject, entitled “Jacob at Peniel.” Order it by going to and clicking on the link on the home page.]

Nuts! In closing, a final story related to the Battle of the Bulge is pertinent. The Allies chose to stop Hitler’s advance at a place called Bostogne. The 101st Airborne Division, nicknamed “The Screaming Eagles” were assigned, against all odds, to hold Bostogne. The Germans surrounded the 101st at Bostogne and demanded their surrender. Brigadier General Anthony McAuliffe’s now famous response was “Nuts.” When the Germans asked for an interpretation of this, the American officer delivering the message said, “It means you can go to hell.”

The Allies then needed the weather to clear up in order to use their air superiority. General Patton ordered his chaplain to compose a prayer asking God to clear up the weather. The next day the skies were clear and our aircraft began to control the air war and destroy the enemy. Before the battle, the 101st’s first commander, Major General William C. Lee, made the following statement to his soldiers:

The 101st Airborne Division, activated at Camp Claiborne, Louisiana, has no history, but it has a rendezvous with destiny. Like the early American pioneers whose invincible courage was the foundation stone of this nation, we have broken with the past and its traditions in order to establish our claim to the future. Due to the nature of our armament, and the tactics in which we shall perfect ourselves, we shall be called upon to carry out operations of far-reaching military importance and we shall habitually go into action when the need is immediate and extreme. Let me call your attention to the fact that our badge is the great American eagle. This is a fitting emblem for a division that will crush its enemies by falling upon them like a thunderbolt from the skies. The history we shall make, the record of high achievement we hope to write in the annals of the American Army and the American people, depends wholly and completely on the men of this division. Each individual, each officer and each enlisted man, must therefore regard himself as a necessary part of a complex and powerful instrument for the overcoming of the enemies of the nation. Each, in his own job, must realize that he is not only a means, but an indispensable means for obtaining the goal of victory. It is, therefore, not too much to say that the future itself, in whose molding we expect to have our share, is in the hands of the soldiers of the 101st Airborne Division. (Emphasis mine.)

The Screaming Eagles Must Arise Hitler personally orchestrated the Battle of the Bulge. I believe Satan is personally orchestrating his forces in the battle against Bush and the church of America. God is calling the “Screaming Eagles” of intercession to take our stand and win the air war in the heavenlies, stopping the enemy’s advance. Like the Screaming Eagles of yesterday, we can write a history of commitment, bravery, self-sacrifice and victory. “The future itself, in whose molding we expect to have our share, is in the hands of” the church. Satan says we can’t win, I say “Nuts!” We can win this war against terrorism and for the soul of America, but only in the spirit.. If we don’t do so, the greater sin won’t be our president’s but ours – the church of America.

If this word rings true in your heart, pass it on – and PRAY! Pray in church services; hold special prayer meetings; fast and pray; send a prayer team to Washington, D.C. to pray; pause at family gatherings to pray; pray at home groups. Pray, pray, pray.

Let’s do our part and win this war.

Dutch Sheets

Friday, November 10, 2006

FW: Would you believe Wal-Mart is doing this?

Thought this one might be worth forwarding

Marriage is under attack & Wal-Mart is supporting that destruction

I’ll be shopping Target & K-mart this holiday season

-----Original Message-----
From: AFA ActionAlert []
Wednesday, November 08, 2006 5:56 PM

Subject: Would you believe Wal-Mart is doing this?

Donald E. Wildmon
Founder and Chairman

November 9, 2006

Please help us get this information into the hands of as many people as possible by forwarding it to your entire email list of family and friends.

Wal-Mart Contributes 5% Of Online Sales To Homosexual Group

Sign the pledge not to shop at Wal-Mart or Sam's Club on the Friday and Saturday following Thanksgiving. Time is short. Act today!


Help recruit 1,000,000 families who will agree not to shop at Wal-Mart or Sam's Club (owned by Wal-Mart) on the Friday and Saturday following Thanksgiving. Here's why:

In a show of support to help homosexuals legalize same-sex marriage, Wal-Mart has agreed to automatically donate 5% of online sales directly to the Washington DC Community Center for Gay, Lesbian Bisexual and Transgender People. The cash donation will come from online purchases made at Wal-Mart through the homosexual group's Web site. This move follows Wal-Mart's joining the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce and agreeing to give generous financial help to that organization also.

Every purchase made online for books, music, videos, clothing and accessories, children's clothing and toys, and electronics at the site will automatically send 5% of the sales to the CCBLBT People. The agreement is an indication that Wal-Mart is totally committed to supporting the homosexual movement.

Wal-Mart also gave a generous cash donation to the Northwest Arkansas Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender Community Center, helping to provide a place where homosexuals can come together to "socialize."

Many observers feel it would have been a wise business decision for Wal-Mart to remain neutral in the cultural battle over homosexual marriage. But this was an ideological decision by Wal-Mart - not a business decision.

Take Action

1. Sign the petition to Wal-Mart letting them know you will be one of the 1,000,000 families who will not shop at Wal-Mart or Sam's Club on the Friday or Saturday following Thanksgiving.

2. VERY IMPORTANT! Millions of Americans are not aware of Wal-Mart's support for homosexual marriage. PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO ALL YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY.

3. Print out and distribute the Wal-Mart Pass Along Sheet by clicking here.

For past Wal-Mart Action Alerts, plus answers to your questions (where to shop?), Click Here.

Click Here to Sign the Petition to Wal-Mart Now!

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Donald E. Wildmon, Founder and Chairman
American Family Association

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